🚩 Tactical Memo 006: Managing Up Without Losing Yourself

You know how to manage projects, lead your team, and keep things moving.

But no one teaches you how to manage up.

Especially when your boss is inconsistent, political, or just plain unclear.

The Problem

You’re executing well, staying on top of tasks, and keeping your team focused. However, the target keeps shifting. One day, your manager emphasizes the importance of speed. Next, it’s all about polish. You ask for clarity and get vague direction. You try to adapt, but the rules keep changing. Now you're managing your project and your manager’s unpredictability at the same time.

Most people in this situation tend to fall into one of three patterns. They go passive and wait to be told what to do. They become quietly bitter, frustrated that their work isn’t having the impact it should. Or they burn out trying to manage up with no structure, hoping that if they just work harder, things will fall into place. None of these options builds long-term influence. They create survival patterns, not leadership presence.

The Shift

Top-performing leaders know how to move forward even when direction from above is unclear. They don't take inconsistency personally. They learn to work around it, not against it. They don’t try to change their manager. They stay anchored in their own clarity. They don’t react to political pressure. They focus on structure, alignment, and quiet confidence.

Managing up is not about being liked, nor is it about constantly adjusting to someone's mood. It’s about protecting your energy, creating clear communication, and delivering outcomes in a way that earns trust, even when expectations are vague. This is where the C.O.R.E. Framework comes in; a weekly structure that helps you navigate inconsistency without becoming inconsistent yourself.

The Framework: C.O.R.E.

The C.O.R.E. Framework gives you four habits to build structure into your relationship with any manager, especially when direction is unstable, priorities shift often, or you're dealing with politics you can't control.

Clarify Commitments
Start every week by identifying what your manager believes are the most important priorities at the moment. Not what you think they should be. Not what was true last week. Ask directly or verify based on recent behavior. Then confirm those commitments in writing if needed. Operating off assumed expectations is a fast path to misalignment and blame.

Own the Narrative
Don’t wait for your manager to ask where things stand. Each week, share a clear and simple summary of what’s done, what’s in motion, and what you need from them. This puts you in control of the story and prevents last-minute surprises. Even if your manager is reactive or scattered, you remain calm and consistent.

Reframe Feedback
When you receive vague, confusing, or even unfair feedback, don’t get defensive. Instead, ask questions to clarify the expectations. Say things like, "Can you help me understand what success would have looked like?" or "What should I do differently next time?" Reframing isn’t about defending your work. It’s about aligning future direction so the conversation stays productive.

Establish Guardrails
If your manager keeps piling on tasks, shifting goals, or skipping over necessary trade-offs, speak up with clarity and assert your needs. Offer choices. For example, say, "We can prioritize X or Y this week. Which is more important?" or "To meet that deadline, I’ll need your help unblocking this dependency. Is that okay with you?" Boundaries are not signs of resistance. They are tools of professional alignment.

The Tool: Weekly C.O.R.E. Reset

Use the following questions as a five-minute prep before your next 1:1 or status meeting with your manager. You can keep them in your notebook, digital planner, or team hub.

• What priorities matter most to my manager this week?

• What progress and obstacles should I report clearly?

• What feedback needs to be reframed or clarified?

• Where do I need to set boundaries or offer trade-offs?

This short prep keeps you anchored, even when the direction above you is chaotic. You cannot control your manager’s behavior, but you can control how clearly and consistently you lead upward.

The Application

Before your next check-in, take five minutes to complete the C.O.R.E. reset. Pick one deliverable you’re working on and write down the version of success your manager likely wants to see. Draft one question that checks if that expectation still holds. Then prepare one statement or option that frames a necessary trade-off.

You don’t have to present all of this at once. Just using one of these habits changes how you show up. It changes how your manager experiences you. And most importantly, it puts you back in control of your time and energy.

The Challenge

For the next two weeks, use the C.O.R.E. Framework before each 1:1 or project update. Focus on one habit at a time. If you’ve been assuming priorities, start by clarifying them. If you’ve been frustrated by last-minute direction changes, start by setting a boundary. You don’t have to run the full playbook to get results. You just have to begin.

You’ll find that the emotional load lightens. Your communication sharpens. Your decisions become cleaner. That’s the compounding effect of managing up with structure.

The Final Thought

You do not need a perfect manager to grow in your role. You need a repeatable system that helps you stay clear, consistent, and focused, regardless of the politics or unpredictability above you.

Use the C.O.R.E. Framework. Apply one habit this week. And lead from the middle with the kind of stability your team and your leadership both need more of.

Until next time,
Justin

✍️ From the Desk of Justin Bateh, PhD
Real-world tactics. No fluff. Just what works.

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